1. The problem areas of life are not the problem
   If you have a relationship or any other area of life that isn’t working, there will always be an underlying condition of resisting or hanging on that is destroying your ability to see clearly. It keeps you from finding solutions and forces you to act in a way that magnifies the problem.
2. When you get upset, you make your situation worse
   When you are full of fear and upset, you get tunnel vision. You close down and lose your ability to see what works. All you can do is fight, resist, hang on and withdraw. This in turn makes your situation worse.
3. Upsets are never caused by what happens
   Upsets seem to be caused by what happens, but they are not. Upsets are caused by fighting and resisting what happens. The moment you take away the fighting and resisting, the upset disappears. You restore both your peace of mind and your effectiveness.
4. We fight the truth
   Whenever you are upset, you are fighting the truth. At any moment, the people in your life are the way that they are. The circumstances of your life are the way that they are and you are the way that you are. Everything may change tomorrow, but at any moment, what’s so is always what’s so.
5. Fighting the truth keeps you from finding solutions
   When you fight the truth, you destroy your ability to see the truth. When you can’t see your situation for the way it really is, you can’t see what you need to do. The problem then continues.
6. Whatever you resist gets magnified
   Imagine four yellow balloons, but whatever you do, don’t think about them. Notice what happens when you try not to think of them. You get more yellow balloons. The same principle applies in every aspect of life. The more you resist something, the more you magnify it.
7. Resisting destroys love
   Notice how it feels when someone can’t accept you for who you are. It hurts. You then get upset and become critical of the other person. Then that person gets upset and becomes more critical of you. When you resist the truth of the way someone is, you create conflict and destroy love.
8. When you blame, you give away your power
   When you blame, you make yourself a victim and destroy your ability to take effective action. Instead of focusing on yourself, you are focusing on the other person. This keeps you stuck. If you can’t see your role in a problem, you won’t be able to do anything about it.
9. Flowing with life is the key to mastery of life
   Look at the areas of your life that work effortlessly. These are areas where you can flow with whatever happens. When you can flow with life, you have peace of mind. You see your situation clearly and can see what needs to be done.
10. Letting go restores your effectiveness
    The moment you let go of the resisting, the fear, upset and tunnel vision disappear. You restore your ability to see clearly and the problem area starts clearing up. You become creative, resourceful and able to find solutions you could never have seen before.
11. We fight the truth to avoid feeling a hurt from the past
    On the surface, we resist certain circumstances, but on a deeper level, we don’t resist the circumstances, we resist all the feelings and emotion that the circumstances reactivate. We resist a very specific hurt from the past.
12. The avoidance of this hurt is what sabotages our lives
    Avoiding this hurt creates the fear, upset and tunnel vision that sabotages our lives. Every area of life that doesn’t work can be traced to this hurt. Fortunately, this hurt is a based on an illusion and can be healed. As you heal this hurt, you gain power over your life.
13. The key to healing hurt is to feel it willingly
    Little children are masters at healing hurt. This is because they feel their hurt willingly. This willingness allows the hurt to run it’s course. It comes and then it goes. When you fight the hurt, it can’t release. It turns into pain and stays.
14. There are two types of hurt
    There is the hurt of the circumstances and the deeper, childhood hurt of feeling worthless, unlovable, not good enough, failure, or some other form of feeling not okay. It’s the avoidance of this deeper hurt that sabotages our lives.
15. Every area of your life that doesn’t work can be resolved
    It is possible to handle all the areas of your life that don’t work. You can heal your past and you can get your power back. You can have love in every relationship and in every aspect of life. We can show you how.

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Would you like to end the conflict, heal the hurt, and restore your inner peace? Would you like to heal your relationship? You can. The best way to do this is to work directly with Bill Ferguson. Give us a call. We can talk about your situation and create a plan of action.

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